This love is killing me, and you know why my only one? I see you cannot feel me, you cannot feel who I am and what I need, or maybe you can but you don’t want to let me be happy. Sometimes it seems like you enjoy in my weakness and vulnerability… And that’s just because you want to prove something to yourself. But love should be stronger than anything else!

When people say that love is giving without fear, that it is never jealous, they are right... It is when you are happy when you see your loved one smiling, it is when you try everything to make him happy, when you are listening, watching and looking a way to do that but without anybody to tell you what to do, when you know his wishes, needs, fears… And if you one day feel that for somebody you can say you love that person. And according to this I can say I truly love you!!!

When we are happy we should divide it with each other… but… If we are sad, we need to divide that too… If I cry maybe I need you to stay besides me, maybe you should hug me, maybe we should speak… but you cannot leave me in the dark and go watching TV… Maybe sometimes I don’t need sex, maybe I need to make love with you…. Maybe I don’t need de-luxe dinner, but I need to sit with you by the ocean and watching sunset… Maybe I don’t need expensive things, but maybe I need some surprise, maybe I need you to prepare something for me, to light candles for me, to buy me a flower….

And that’s all… I don’t need so much to be happy with you…

Now, my self confidence is completely destroyed, and I need to recover it somehow…
And I want to be happy again… and I need to smile… to be beautiful again… to wish to be beautiful… to wish to go out, to see people again, to have fun… to feel alive again...